By Leadfoot_LA and Bella, Age 9
Bella is back! We
popped popcorn and are ready to go…
Cabin Fever
Willow tells Bristol she wants to do hair for the rest of
her life. She wants to check out a hair
school in Arizona. Bristol says that she
is proud of her for taking initiative, and is “actually a little jealous.”
Bristol asks if she can manage Willow’s salon, or be an investor. Willow says no, that she would never want to
work with Bristol because they don’t get along.
Willow goes to Andy’s house to tell him she is going to
Arizona to check out a school and she would be gone for 12 months. He asks if she wants him to go, and she
laughs and says no. Andy looks sad and
says he isn’t excited for her. Willow
calls him a “jackass” and leaves. In her
cut-away interview she says this change will be much harder for Andy than it is
for her, but “life moves on.” Apparently so.
She is now in a relationship with a different beau, Christopher Wyckoff.
Willow and Andy go out to eat with friends. Andy says he “can’t read the menu.” This
doesn’t mean he is illiterate (remember, he wrote love notes to Willow for
Valentine’s Day), it just means that he doesn’t understand the fancy verbiage
on the menu. He doesn’t know what
marinara sauce is – he just wants “spaghetti with sauce, with meat in it.” Willow gets mad at him and tells him to stop
being so stupid and he calls her a bitch.
He apologizes, but Willow gets up and leaves the restaurant. Bella says, “Willow is so mean!”
Bristol and Gino are driving to Fairbanks to stay in a cabin
before driving to the finish of the Iron Dog.
Gino says he misses Tripp. Bristol says “I love him so freakin’ much.” She says that having Tripp at such a young age
made her “instantly 45 years old.” I say
out loud, “no, all that plastic surgery made you instantly 45 years old!” Bella laughs.
Bristol asks Gino “Do you think we are going to get married?” He tries to avoid the question, but she
pushes him, so he says he can’t imagine being without her and Tripp. She immediately starts talking about a summer
wedding. In a cut-away interview,
Bristol says that “it would be nice to have him as Tripp’s dad.” OH. MY. GOD.
Now I know she remembers that Tripp HAS a biological father, because
Levi occupies her thoughts about 85% of the time. But how does she think it benefits her, or
Tripp, in any way to keep acting like he doesn’t have one?!
Willow visits Trendsetters, a hair school in Anchorage. The interviewer tells her that she would have
to go 9-5:30, Tuesday through Saturday.
She says she can’t imagine her Friday nights “being gone.” He tells her that success often comes
disguised as hard work. They make her practice
on a mannequin head and she says, among other things, “parting is kind of
tricky” and “this is so confusing already” and “this is harder than I thought
it was going to be.” She wonders what
she is getting herself into. Bella
laughs throughout this entire scene. She
could do better on a Barbie doll.
Somehow Tripp is now with Gino and Bristol at the
cabin. She says this is the first time
she has been away with “her little family.”
They say grace and eat dinner. At
midnight (!!), they tell Tripp it is bedtime.
He says no, so they tell him that midnight is when the wolves come out
to eat them. He believes them, and goes
to bed. Bristol says that she and Gino
never spend any “adult time together.” Ewwww. She tells him to “get his squishy face over
here,” and we cut to a commercial. Thank
God!
Bristol, Gino and Tripp play in the snow. Gino grabs Bristol in a playful way (they are
both laughing), when Tripp starts crying and says, “I don’t like you, you dumb…” Bristol thinks it is cute because he is so
protective of mommy.
At the finish of the Iron Dog, Sarah tells them all that
Todd is being towed by his partner because of clutch problems. Sarah is wearing a dead rabbit’s foot on her
zipper pull. Gross!
Willow, who is now driving Bristol’s old truck, goes to Andy’s
house. Andy tries to talk about their
relationship and says he is sorry, but that she has to realize she was treating
him poorly too. She refuses to apologize
to him because “he was being childish.”
He says she never thinks she does anything wrong, but she always
does. Willow says he isn’t being
sincere, so she leaves and says she is “over it” and it is time for them to “go
their separate ways.”
Bristol has a voice over about always setting goals and
working hard to reach them. God will
guide her steps, blah blah blah. Bella
and I both look at each other and roll our eyes.
New Beginnings
Bristol and Gino go to look at a piece of property as a
potential investment. Gino says they could build a house as partners, and for
every $100 she puts in, he will put in $1.
He says the disparity is because he will be doing all the work. She says that she is “not his sugar mama” and
she “doesn’t want be his business partner.”
In what might possibly be the very first smart thing I have ever heard
her say, she says, “I’m not going in on anything with you unless it is 50-50.” But then she reverts right back to
Bristol-ing him, and uses this conversation to prod him about getting
married. He tells her that he loves her
and he wants to do this with her, and that she should have some faith. She says, “this is a big huge chance-y thing”
and refuses.
Willow does Bristol’s hair while she whines because she it
hurts. Willow says “I am going to punch you in the face” for like the millionth
time since this series started. Sarah
comes in and says she needs her roots touched up. They talk about which school she should go
to and Sarah tells her that first she has to learn to be “polite and social and
gracious.” Ha! Good luck!
Gino and Andy go bowling.
Andy says he will miss Willow when she goes. Andy reminds me of Keanu Reeves, but much sadder. Gino tells Andy about the potential
investment with Bristol and Andy teases him about having to get married. Bella actually pays attention when these two
are on screen.
Apropos
Bristol and Willow go to Phoenix and stay at the Valley Ho
hotel. HAHAHAHA. How perfect for the two Valley Hos. Bristol says, “look at that pool outside, Tripp.”
Then when he wants to go swimming, Bristol says no, because “there are a bunch
of drunk kids down there.” So
mean!! She tells him he has to go to bed
instead. He says he “hates that.” Bristol says, “that’s really nice Sunshine. Just sit down and be a good boy.” He answers, “No!
I’m not! I hate you guys!” They laugh at him tell him that God is
watching him, but Bristol literally cracks up halfway through saying it. Now, admittedly, I laughed out loud when he
said it too – his face was very cute and he was trying hard to act
serious. But I would have followed it up
with a serious talk about how we don’t treat people that way and that now he
has to lose a priviledge. Bristol
literally has ZERO follow-through.
They warn him he will be put into time out if he says it
again, and tell him he is “not cute.” “YOU’RE
not cute!” he answers. “I hate you!!” Willow says she is going to put soap in his
mouth and he says, according to the subtitles, “Go away, you f***.” But to me, after watching it 25 times, it
sounds like, “I don’t like you! F*** it!”
Bristol and Willow laugh. Bristol
says, “I am doing a terrible job of disciplining Tripp.” Willow tells him to go sit in the chair for
time out and he just says, “NO!”
Now I know you are wondering why Bristol would leave that
scene in. Easy – she wants her show to
be like Keeping up with the Kardashians. The Kardashians swear a lot on their reality
show – so Bristol would want to mimic that, the same way she tries to mimic the
way Kim talks. The difference is, the Kardashian sisters aren’t evil to the
core, so when they swear it comes off as funny.
They usually do it as a stress relief or a way to laugh at
themselves. They would NEVER do it in
front of small children, or as a way to hurt each other. The Kardashians are obviously a loving
family, so when they greet each other with “hey beyatch,” it is odd, but is clearly
meant as a term of endearment. Bristol
and Willow – not so much. The Palin
sisters obviously hate each other.
They go to visit the beauty school in Arizona, Penrose Academy,
where the interviewer tells them that communication skills are very
important. Bristol says, “Willow really
needs to work on that.” The lady says, “are
you being funny?” (BURN!) And Bristol
says, “no, I am being serious!” Who
brings their sister and her bratty toddler son to an interview, anyway?!
The interviewer says that she expects women to treat each
other well. Willow says the only thing
that she is worried about is “Liberals that hate her last name. Their views are
idiotic.” Bella says, “YOU are idiotic!”
and I shoot her a surprised and disapproving glance. She mouths the word, “sorry.” She knows I’m not really mad about that one.
Bristol goes to finalize the sale of her Arizona house, which
she says she “bought with her Dancing with the Stars money,” after she saw it
on Craig’s List. Gino calls, and Willow
says she hates him, “because he is a douchebag.”
Back in Alaska, she breaks the news to Andy that she is
going to Arizona for hair school. He
says, “So you are choosing Arizona over me?
You really want to make a living doing hair the rest of your life? What am I going to do?” Willow says, “Go to school!” He says, “why would I do that? Why would I
waste money?” She answers, “To get a
better career dude!” He says she is
being selfish and she says HE is being selfish.
He says she has no heart. No,
Andy, she just isn’t that into you.
Bristol drives Willow to the airport and says, “Now I
officially have zero friends.” LOL! They pray together in the truck and giggle
their way through it. Willow hugs
Bristol and says she will kind of miss her.
Bristol drives off into the snow.
Bristol and Tripp move out of the apartment and into their
new house across the lake. They have movers,
because all single moms can afford movers.
(Seriously, what does Todd DO?!)
Bristol tells Gino that any plans to invest in property together are
going to have to wait until they have something more concrete together. That girl REALLY wants to get married. Unfortunately, it isn’t really Gino she wants.
+++
By Patrick:
Leadfoot and Bella, thank you so much again for this brilliant review! We really appreciate it and know what you are going through! Watching Bristol's show is just another form of legal torture.
There was one scene in particular which our readers already hotly discussed in the comments of our last post - Tripp drops the "f"-word, or I should better say "a" not 100% clearly defined "f"-word. I am sure that the opinions will be divided here, but after listening very, very carefully, I came to the conclusion that Tripp actually says to Willow in this scene: "Go away, you faggot." This would also be entirely consistent with the language Willow used before in facebook comments, as TMZ reported in November 2010 (download the complete foul-mouthed facebook comments by Willow and Bristol HERE). After all, Tripp must have heard this language before somewhere!
Screenshot:
It's of course no surprise at all that Tripp shows these shocking manners - after all, his mother Bristol already behaved in public like a foul-mouthed brat as well, and she clearly has no clue how to teach Tripp not to use these words. But then, this really seems to be the usual language which is being used in the Palin-home, judging by this reality show - and judging by what we already know, for example by Bristol's nasty facebook comments from 2010:
But judge for yourself - here is the clip:
+++
By Patrick:
Leadfoot and Bella, thank you so much again for this brilliant review! We really appreciate it and know what you are going through! Watching Bristol's show is just another form of legal torture.
There was one scene in particular which our readers already hotly discussed in the comments of our last post - Tripp drops the "f"-word, or I should better say "a" not 100% clearly defined "f"-word. I am sure that the opinions will be divided here, but after listening very, very carefully, I came to the conclusion that Tripp actually says to Willow in this scene: "Go away, you faggot." This would also be entirely consistent with the language Willow used before in facebook comments, as TMZ reported in November 2010 (download the complete foul-mouthed facebook comments by Willow and Bristol HERE). After all, Tripp must have heard this language before somewhere!
Screenshot:
It's of course no surprise at all that Tripp shows these shocking manners - after all, his mother Bristol already behaved in public like a foul-mouthed brat as well, and she clearly has no clue how to teach Tripp not to use these words. But then, this really seems to be the usual language which is being used in the Palin-home, judging by this reality show - and judging by what we already know, for example by Bristol's nasty facebook comments from 2010:
But judge for yourself - here is the clip:
Here is the same clip (click here if there is a problem with the embedded video below) without the country restriction that was imposed on youtube:
Kathleen has the following opinion:
For Bristol and Willow Palin, life is not a "Tripp", but a series of swearwords which Tripp then picks up.
Very, very sad.
Great Blog , lots of interesting tips, think I might have to have
ReplyDeletea go at one of these in the next few years. Got a 6hour day/night
endure in the summer which should be a good laugh. Building up to
the big 24 ;-)
Apartment Mover